Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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