it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
