She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
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APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
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I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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