Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
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