Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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