There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
