i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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