i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
