if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
