If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.