You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize