break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
