Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
