I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
youre lurking in front of me
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I'm really busy with my period
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