It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.