is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
