the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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