There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize