Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
