sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
