i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I wish i was in the wii world.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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