Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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