he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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