i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
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