Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
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Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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