I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Randomize
