don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Randomize