TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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