This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Randomize
