You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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