so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
