nut hugger
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Randomize
