why didn't you poke me back
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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