You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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