I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.