Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.