White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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