Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story

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(330): View more from Ohio

I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.

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(618): View more from Illinois

Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.

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(714): View more from California

You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.

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(347): View more from New York

Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?

(1-347): View more from New York

Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.

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