i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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