Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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