but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
