at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
