i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
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