Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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