she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
