is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize