i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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