i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
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