Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
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Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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