okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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